Mickey, you are...

#findmickey

People should never just vanish...

I address this to Mickey… but. it’s probably my way of dealing with this horrible situation. An attempt at understanding evil, understanding the impossible.

A Letter to the love shown by the people of Lafayette.

           A Letter to Mickey.

Dear Mickey, whom I’ve never met, I think about you all the time.

          I wonder if we’ve crossed paths in town before, at school perhaps? Or maybe on our bikes. What does this mean? Maybe nothing at all. Or perhaps all of this self-reflection that many of us have undoubtedly been feeling in the last couple weeks does mean something; maybe it means everything.  Maybe, just maybe, we’ll look at the people around us a little differently. Maybe we’ll pay more attention.

Dear Mickey, I see myself in you. I think you’ve captivated everyone for many reasons; there’s a purity that gleams in your eyes, an easy-kind-of-freedom that radiates from your smile.

You are our daughters and our best friends. You are the butterfly that tickles a little girl’s nose.

The fact is we’ve all grown throughout this ordeal. We’ve learned about ourselves, about the precariousness of life. Maybe most importantly, we’ve learned to grow as a community.

I close my eyes and I send you my love, wherever you are, Mickey.

Love, me.

Kisatchie National Forest, LA : a weekend of lessons

I finally got to go camping in Louisiana, during Easter weekend at Kisatchie National Forest. Boasting more than 600 000 acres, this place was sure to tickle my camping fancy. There's not much I enjoy more than camping out in the wilderness. Forget the well laid-out campgrounds. I want to be in the middle of nowhere, where I can find myself once again. I want to hear the wind in the trees and the birds (and the bees). After a rough couple weeks of unexpected news (which is always followed by questions of: what do I want in life?, etc) this retreat was needed. Hikes, gourmet camp food, hot sun, bugs, and yes - the Easter bunny found me out here!

The trees never seem to sleep. They watch over us as we drift off into slumber. Although I was very tired as I lay curled up in a sleeping bag, my mind suddenly became very clear, and I knew I had to write.

The full moon was lighting up the sky and creating beautiful silhouettes for me 

throught the tent's netting:

Darkness

The forest is a desert

whose silence makes

the crickets blare

symphonies of

Reminders.

And forces you to look into

the cold shadows

of your heart.

Tree limbs stretched

out above your head

Not judging you but

patiently showing

you what you're

choosing.

to ignore.

The moon 

watches you

over you

It can teach you

more enlightening things

about yourself

Than the Sun ever could

Because when the moon arrives

at night,

It shuts off the lights of the World

and achingly shines

its spotlight on your

Earthly self.

There's nowhere to hide

in the Darkness.

April 8th 2012. GT. Kisatchie.

Doobie Brothers Road Trip.

I was sitting in the library, not at « work », but working on my thesis. Well, in all honesty I was looking at my screen thinking intelligent thoughts about Acadie, while listening to Classic Rock. The Doobie Brother’s “China Grove” came on my Itunes. (go ahead, play it)

My foot started to tap. I possibly did some subtle air-guitar playing. Nonetheless, it put me in a good mood, as it usually does. I was transported to my dream land, a land where my dreams come true and everything's nice. Ah yes. I imagined me taking the road trip I’ve been meaning to take, across America. Summertime. Windows down, classic rock blaring, sticking my hand out and feeling the pressure of the air in and under my hand. Stopping in interesting towns. Eating interesting food. Laughing uncontrollably with fatigue. Almost running out of gas a few times. Sleeping in a tent, and once, at a cheap motel because it was raining too damn hard.
Lots of coffee cups in the backseat.

All of this ignites the flame that lights up who I really am.

Here's a picture of my 2 great friends, when we took a road trip to New Orleans last year... the dream continues, but the dream is now. I'm going to make my dreams come true. (apologies for sounding so cliché. actually, I'm not sorry. I'm proud of my clichéness). Leave a comment. About anything that makes your foot tap, or about your dreams. Be sappy with me, my  friends. Peace ;)

Afternoon Groceries on my bike.

The splendor of a warm afternoon rain unearthed the beauty in the misty air as I rode my bike to the grocery store.
Pedalling allows me to glide through the world. Freer than most folks stuck in their cars. I feel closer to the trees. I feel every little bump below me. I hear things I'd never heard.
Time is no longer measured by anxious small moments that have deadlines so near you can taste them. Heart pounding and short breaths.
Time is measured by the endless possibility of tomorrow and of the upcoming year. Life is eternal. As long as you feel its Energy. The heart smiles and you breathe fully.
A little girl with hair so blond in a car with her mom stopped at the corner where I was waiting to cross. She was probably 12. Her shy gaze looked up at me, down at her lap, and back up at me. I smiled. She smiled back.
She was me at that age.
A glance in a mirror. 
What have I accomplished in 15 years? What have I endured?
I remembered who I was then, a girl that wanted to save the rainforests, play with monkeys. I was going to change the world. And by night I was a ninja.
Possibilities. Growing older closes doors that actually cannot be closed because all we have are windows. It's all about how you choose to see.
I wondered for a moment what the girl thought about me. 
Sometimes I feel so connected to my surroundings, it's as though I am them and they are me. Maybe that's why I have so much faith in others.
Easier to get hurt.
I'm so grateful that I get the chance to have a 'bike' kind of life. My days have movement.
Our lives are but a passing wind, from childhood to the last breath. I want to fill my days with love from now on.

Surprise!...here's Life.

Life as a Surprise.

Some people will surprise you in good ways, and unfortunately, others will surprise you in very bad ways, something you would never have expected from them.

It may throw you on the ground, and you may feel as though the dust inhibits you from breathing and from properly seeing the world spinning around you.

Just wait for the dust to settle. It'll come in a day, a week, maybe a month. But it will come.

And when it does, you will lift yourself off of the ground, and you will find a new, beautiful path that you had never seen before. Maybe you will hop on a train and end up somewhere new. Or maybe you'll stay somewhere familiar, as strong as ever.

Nevertheless, just hold on to that invisible thing that is Hope. It'll get you through anything my dears.

Love,

G.

ps: and if not, eat dark chocolate and drink coffee.

Alone in Learning

You don't expect that the people you love in your life may not always be there, especially by choice. But it happens. 
They will shock you.
And you try to deal with it best you can. Even if it means serious workouts followed by eating dark chocolate while watching comedies from the 80's. And hugs from your friends. Many of those. Because sometimes the tears are going to fall even if you hate that you've been reduced to that, but the hugs make you feel less alone. We're only human.
So this brings me to the thought I have in my mind this week: being alone.

I think I've been waiting a while to find someone that would want to experience life with me. Someone that genuinely would enjoy going on my sometimes silly adventures.
But what if I can't find someone willing to do that with me?
I'm going to have to plan on doing these things alone.


I have a Bucket List with over 40 entries. I'm sure that list will grow to exceed 100. It gives me satisfaction to scratch off one more thing accomplished. 

I've decided to make a list of some of those things that I want to do this year. I can't wait for that impossible person to join me. So far, I am going to:

•  skydive
•  Finish Masters degree
•  a trip to Alberta
•  Go to Italy to study here (http://www.adg.it/) (may be far-fetched, but I'm going to try my best)
•  Yoga outside at Sunset & at Sunrise
•  lots & lots of camping and hiking
•  purchase a DSLR

Hey friends,

Don't forget to check out my bucket list! (I really want to know what you all are yearning to do as well! leave comments! That would make my day)

Also, there's my 'Let's play nice' blog, where I recently posted a link to a great non-profit organization...that I think you should check out! 

Don't forget to "follow me", that way I'll know if anyone's actually reading this...lol

Hope you all have a safe and thrilling Halloween!

*Keeping the people in Thailand in my thoughts*